Sometimes, there are no right words.

Like during some of the most unimaginable moments, like loss of a child during pregnancy or postpartum (or the hope of having one). But no matter the pain, challenge, transition or transformation — every woman can feel more centered and supported with the right self-care rituals.

There are countless websites and resources devoted to healthy pregnancies. But there’s little mainstream info out there about miscarriage, infertility, and losing a baby during or after birth.

If this is your experience, then you know, better than anyone, it’s an impossibly painful topic. I’m glad you’re here, though, because that means there’s a part of you searching for healing. And the search is where it starts.

I’ve been helping mothers make the new baby transition for the last 10 years (and done it myself twice). But, full disclosure: my skill set is limited when it comes to perinatal loss.

I am not a bereavement doula or grief counselor. I have never faced infertility or lost a child. I’ve helped guide clients through many different types of trauma and transition, but only a handful of them process this type of loss.

Still, one thing is for sure if you’re going through this: your self-care is 100% critical to your ability to acknowledge, move through, and heal as much as you can from the heartbreak.

So, what exactly is self-care in the middle of loss? A lot different than you may have ever been told. It’ll be less manicures and hot sips of tea (although that may be part of your plan) and more like getting through each day any way you can. It’s grief, gentleness, letting it out, letting it go, holding on to what matters, celebrating your baby’s moments of life, and loving yourself through all of it. It’s resilience building of the highest order.

Though our content here is limited until we can offer support specifically for mothers who experience these feelings of deep loss around pregnancy and/or postpartum, I offer some favorite resources on this page.

You are lovingly invited to stick around and learn all the self-care things we share, but know that there will be many mentions of babies and small people. Only you know if you are ready for these references. When the time is right, I hope this site helps you start a new self-care journey.

Big love,

Healing Hearts | Healing Hearts has a comprehensive list of resources (with summaries for each), as well as general grief information, for anyone dealing with perinatal loss. Affiliated with Earth Mama® Organics and First Candle, they offer counseling services available 24/7 at 1-800-221-7437.

Share | Designed to support parents who’ve experienced pregnancy loss, stillbirth, or loss in the first few months of life. Features monthly loss chats (including chats in Spanish), and includes caregiver resources, training, and local chapter network for in-person support.

Libby Weintraub

Still Standing Magazine | For all who are grieving child loss and infertility.

Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep | Remembrance portraits and memorabilia

First Candle | Bereavement support for families who have experienced a loss.

The Compassionate Friends | Friendship, understanding, and hope for those going through the natural grieving process.

Still Birthday | A pregnancy loss is still a birthday.

LAMPS | Life After Miscarriage, Perinatal Loss, and Stillbirth

Connect & Breathe | A non-judgmental, after-abortion talk line, and a welcome resource if you find yourself in the hundreds of “helpful” resources for post-loss grief that don’t include post-abortion emotions, though they are often extremely complex and hard to process. Call 866-647-1764 (T, W, Th, Sat).

Planned Parenthood | Get care and the information you need.

Spectrum Doula Collective | Virtual Support for the whole spectrum of families.

All-Options | A place where all options, decisions, experiences, and feelings are welcomed and respected, at any point in your journey. | Toll-free Talkline 1-888-493-0092

Exhale| Call the Talkline: 866-4-Exhale